week14 peer review

Peer review 1.

student 14 

Grade
According to the rubric above, what grade would you give this essay? Why?
4 points

How does this essay need to improve to get a better grade?
grammar errors

Thesis
What is the thesis?
 the network real-name system should not be revived as a key solution to current cyber problems.

Is the thesis clear and debatable?
yes


If you (The reviewer) wrote this essay, how would you have written the thesis?
the network real-name system should not be a key solution to the current cyber problem. Any other thoughts?
no

Classical Argument
Can you easily identify the 5 parts of the classical argument? If no, what parts are missing?
there are 5 parts in her essay/

Does the introduction catch your attention? Does it comfortably lead to the thesis? 

yes

Does the narration give all the necessary background information to understand the topic?
she used the definition and specific examples to help the understanding

Does the confirmation adequately support the thesis?
yes

Does the refutation and concession address a realistic counterpoint? Does it adequately dispute the counterpoint, or respond in a reasonable manner?
yes

Does the conclusion summarize the article and address the larger significance of the thesis? 
yes

What suggestions do you have for improving the classical argument structure?
reminding the topic once more..?

Persuasion
When you started reading the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis? 
agree

When you finished the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
agree

If your mind changed, why? What parts of the essay were persuasive?
..................................................................................................................................................

How could the author enhance the persuasive parts of their essay?
she did a good job, but it would be better if she divide three reasons more clearly.

Research
Is the author using research effectively? 
yes, she used very specified examples

Is the research from appropriate sources?
yes

Are the sources obvious?
yes

Are the pieces of evidence relevant to the thesis or essay?
yes

Are there any parts of the essay that need evidence to support the claims?
she has all the evidence!




peer review 2.

student 15


Grade
According to the rubric above, what grade would you give this essay? Why?
4 points

How does this essay need to improve to get a better grade?
change grammar errors and need to write the source

Thesis
What is the thesis?
cultural management is necessary for this society. 

Is the thesis clear and debatable?
yes


If you (The reviewer) wrote this essay, how would you have written the thesis?
cultural management plays an important role in our society. 

Any other thoughts?
no


Classical Argument
Can you easily identify the 5 parts of the classical argument? If no, what parts are missing?
there are 5 parts in his essay

Does the introduction catch your attention? Does it comfortably lead to the thesis? 
yes

Does the narration give all the necessary background information to understand the topic?
narration should include more information that can help the reader's understanding. 

Does the confirmation adequately support the thesis?
yes

Does the refutation and concession address a realistic counterpoint? Does it adequately dispute the counterpoint, or respond in a reasonable manner?
yes

Does the conclusion summarize the article and address the larger significance of the thesis? 
yes

What suggestions do you have for improving the classical argument structure?
more information in introduction.

Persuasion
When you started reading the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis? 
agree

When you finished the essay, did you agree or disagree with the thesis?
agree

If your mind changed, why? What parts of the essay were persuasive?
..................................................................................................................................................

How could the author enhance the persuasive parts of their essay?
he did a good job but it would be better if he write where he got the information from. 

Research
Is the author using research effectively? 
yes

Is the research from appropriate sources?
yes

Are the sources obvious?
yes

Are the pieces of evidence relevant to the thesis or essay?
yes

Are there any parts of the essay that need evidence to support the claims?
need to tell the source!!